LosInG My ReliGioN

Something Borrowed

2012-02-04T02:32:00.000-08:00

The me I know is a world unknown,
From my lighted smile to the inherent warmth.
The silly me is nothing new
Its me but its still something borrowed.

When it all goes wrong
All hope is dead
I cheer up because I know its for the best
Not brooding, thanks to being something borrowed.

At times when brutal defeat stares hard
I tremble , fumble ,crumble and I fail
I cry and I break, I stand up tall, a little late
No one has faith but you, I am happy I am something borrowed.

When I hide it, as cupid strikes
I share not any names, I play mind games, I lie
I say I need you not, sometimes you know I am wrong
When hurt, You still wipe my tears 'cz I am something borrowed.

Often what I want I get not
I deserved it but it was meant not
For I do not curse or get jealous or pry
I will cheer from the sidelines, this goodness is something borrowed.

All endless fights we have
I know you are right
I know you think that its my false pride
I hate it when you are always correct,
Alas even you would be something borrowed.

Life and its morbid experiences
Start to rust me out
I know you will take time out to fix me
I am too dear to you,
A part of you, Something borrowed.

Life comes a full circle someday
My Borrowed potions heal , smile and fix the ones I love
Their pain scars me, even when they Fail me I will stand by them.
This is who we all are,
At heart after all , We are all something borrowed.

This is especially for my MOM and all the ones I love- The Powerpuff girls, My Family , My Friends, and Others who were'nt that wise otherwise . ;)

Khwabon Ke Parindey

2012-01-07T09:51:00.000-08:00

Khwabon Ke Parindey Song -ZNMD

Ude, khule aasaman mein khwabon ke parindey
Ude, dil ke jahaan main khaabon ke parinday
Oho, kya pata, jaayenge kahaan
Khule hain jo pal, kahe yeh nazar
Lagta hai ab hai jaage hum
Fiqrein jo thi, peechhe reh gayi
Nikle unse aage hum
Hawa mein beh rahi hai zindagi
Yeh hum se keh rahi hai zindagi
Oho, ab toh, jo bhi ho so ho

Ude, khule aasaman mein khwabon ke parindey Ude,
dil ke jahaan main khwabon ke parindey
Oho, kya pata, jayenge kahaan
Kisi ne chhua toh yeh hua
Phirte hain mehake mehake hum
Khoyi hain kahin baatein nayi
Jab hain aise behake hum
Hua hai yun ke dil pighal gaye
Bas ek pal mein hum badal gaye
Oho, ab toh, jo bhi ho so ho

Roshni mili Ab raah mein hai ik dilkashi si barsi
Har khusi mili Ab zindagi pe hai zindagi si barsi
Ab jeena hum ne seekha hai

Yaad rahe kal, aaya tha woh pal
Jisme jaadoo aisa tha Hum ho gaye jaise naye
Woh pal jaane kaisa tha
Kahe yeh dil ke jaa udhar bhi tu
Jahaan bhi leke jaaye aarzoo
Oho, ab toh...

The Song-

This is one of the best songs I have heard lately. The lyrics, score and the song have an intense tranquility to it. Khwabon ke Parindey is a song that narrates the Feeling of Falling in Love.
An unsettling restlessness which will keep that smile and glow on.

A moment where worries, expectations and inhibitions will dilute and you would be as light as a feather and flow like a gentle breeze. Your ultimate moment of bliss which is real and not surreal.
Beyond which you are not baffled . Just at ease with yourself .A moment so powerful that even its mere memory will always infuse the same bliss into you as it did when you froze it eternally in your heart. And you would say to yourself, beyond this , "Jo bhi ho so ho". :)

Dreams on Wheels

2012-01-05T11:37:00.000-08:00

First Day , First Show- Delhi Auto Expo 2012

Lights, Camera , Action...
Glitz -Glamor and Style. Auto Expo 2012 is nothing less than a big budget masala flick.

Walking miles and miles to see splendor of Machines on Wheels can be taxing.
Just a glance at the Beauties.Ahem Ahem..not the models but THE SHOW STOPPERS- THE MIGHTY MACHINES makes all the hard work of journey on feet worthwhile.

There is always a first time, and my first experience to witness total stunners backed with excellent technology was a memorable one.No photos can do justice to any of those machines which sparkle and entice you to look at them. I flirted with not one but many such wonderful machines. It was like all vital stats mentioned upfront for open admiration.The detailing on CC, bhp, torque , shockers etc just make these automobiles so much more desirable. You can differentiate eyes and attitude of Men drooling on technology/machines and the ones just there for cheap thrills.

I am still wondering what good would come from so much exposure of models of Indian and Foreign origins. We have clearly undermined the Power of Dreams on Wheels. The real automobile enthusiast would pay attention to detailing not of the Skinny models but the technology and styling behind the machines. Strangely I did see some grading system in utilization of models as well. Next to all new launches / stunners were no less than eye-opening models pulling more unwanted crowd than appreciated. Spectators scanning women in the spotlight deep down under. Behind their fake smiles one could sense their discomfort.The biggest flipside, those models know nothing about the machines they are standing next to. What a pity!

With nothing in hand and nothing in bank, I do have my wishlist ready for must haves before I die. The best was Harley Davidson. No frills only machines roaring of sheer and absolute stunners. Not a single Harley displayed was any less than the other. A rock band was playing to match with the spirit of Harley. Being much more than a bike they can be defining the person who owns it. A rarity on road Harley still has more X Factor than any of the high end cars, even the likes of Jaguar. Nontheless its a game of money and bags full of them at that.

For ones who are done with Harleys of the world, welcome to Triumph. No, its not a lingerie brand, Triumph is almost as phenomenal for women as for any bike enthusiast. They have range of bikes which can make your heart skip a beat when you see the Price Tags. Phenomenal bikes at jaw dropping prices.

A point worth noting is that almost all major automobile manufacturers are launching minimum 1-2 models this year. Be it Scooters launch, a range of SUVs or wonderful small cars. Curious eyes and guessing minds will be kept waiting till the final Press Con happens for all respective Automobile honchos declaring the much awaited launches for 2012. Surprisingly for a year which might see another Depression looming , Auto majors are very positive for the year ahead.

From a ward of Rovers to Cruisers to Fortuners to Maruti Suzuki's Alpha and more , many upgraded models of existing SUVs will flood the Indian markets and test the real waters. Tatas might have ruined the macho look of Safari by introducing its sleeker feminine upgrade Safari Storme.
The automatic transmission of Toyota Fortuner was awaited which is a 4x2 model with another variant with manual transmission which is a 4x4 model with headlamp washers.

However all the classics left me restless. Right from the vintage cars to Classy Gypsy did leave many awe struck. The much awaited BMW Mini (Cooper) was also launched amidst a jam-packed press-con. The luxury hatchback club would widen with Mini joining Beetle and Fiat 500.

Ferraris, Porsche , BMW, Mercedes Benz, Maserati, Jaguar and Audi etc were all out with their four-wheeled gems . The likes of TVS, Honda, Yamaha, Polaris, Hero, Suzuki, Firefox had alot to show-case too the the spectators. Millions of visitors have already witnessed the Year's Moto Extravaganza.

Young men were glued to virtual and video games with a clear "Need for Speed" bug biting them. Rowdy crowds did leave no stone unturned to create an Auto Expo out on the roads, the evening of 6 Jan when all roads to any "Pragati" seemed jammed and blocked. For a city which boasts to be capital of India such severe clogging was as surprising as spotting high profile men and women at the Auto Expo.

I had the pleasure to get a fleeting glance at Rata Tata, Sr Munjal maybe an SRK and Big B , Honchos of all major Auto brands & some prolific editors of Auto mags. And then they said that John Abraham was here, Katrina Kaif and many more. It was a tiring day as A high-heeled and a high headed girl saw her Dreams on Wheels. My list of must owns has even become a little more ambitious than it already was.

Auto expo is like an A list event, where all you can do is window-shopping and as you step out, you are aware that Technology not only changes lives but inspires us to dream bigger. Its indeed an excellent drive to achieve...Vrooooooooooom. Get Set Go.

PS- I am a person who does not know how to ride a car and has 0 knowledge about the Jargons of the world of Automobiles. This is just an experience which left me richer, even after loosing my wallet and a credit card usage of 15000 bucks not made by me. Guess, Every dark cloud has a silver lining. I lost my wallet but have bigger dream to chase.

Just like that..

2012-01-02T14:18:00.000-08:00

Random thoughts keep flooding my mind, Always Just Like That. :)

Days become longer , darkness shorter.

Nights are sleepless & still I feel afresh.

It is sometimes great to think nonsense.

Afterall its just me alone in my world.

My plush life of abundance.

What harm can it do.

To Think through, Just Like That.

When flying high in the sky.

You switch seats to get a view.

And are in awe of An Artist you call Nature.

Painting clouds orange, white, blue and bright.

Imagining these clusters as Flocks of birds & far of Palaces.

Watching sea of clouds turn to a Polar bear.

What harm can it do.

To Glide In, Just Like that.

On a jam packed road.

Seated in your car at ease.

Your favorite song comes by.

Humming it with restrain.

Tapping your feet & clapping silently.

Shaking your head shyly, you look around.

What harm can it do.

To Sing Loud, Just Like That.

Being alone in thoughts is not being lonely.

When solitude brings more meaning.

When in a crowd you have no one to talk to.

You hear your voice assuring you,

"Why bother I am here, with you"

Still an unknown face catches your attention.

What harm can it do.

To Smile Back, Just Like That.

A time when your love hurts you bad.

Tears bring pleasure not sorrows.

Tired of the grim mood you are in.

You peered into the adorable guilty face.

In an instant your affection melts you.

You are healed and become weak.

What harm can it do.

To Forgive Him, Just Like That.

In your complicated life.

Noticing that love again came by.

You stop, smile and wink.

Wonderful outsider beams & it clicks.

To start to build your magical adobe.

Later see him turn cold, dejected again.

What harm can it do.

To Speak Out, Just Like That.

On a hostile winter rainy night.

Out for a stroll in the mist.

You disregard a tiny cranky pup twice.

Selfish, You cared not, but thought once.

Years later you cared more and thought not.

You went home to get food & showed love.

What harm can it do.

To Do Good, Just Like That.

To gaze at the limitless sea, surge.

Into Highs, Lows and Numbs.

Your heart's filled with endless emotions.

With joy, gratitude and pain.

Unaware you wander, salty waters roll down your eye.

And people watch, but should you care.

What harm can it do.

To Walk On, Just Like That.

Trudging an uphill is tough.

The heavy weight breaks you apart.

When risks seem unwise.

Your gut tells you to lie- low.

Rest for a while, its good.

Your will is strained, you sneak out.

What harm can it do.

To Give Up, Just Like That.

On your Judgement Day.

You tremble not.

The Voice Commands

"Why you lived on, Just Like That."

Will You say, I Regret Not.

Yes you will.

Because-

You Thought Through

To Glide In

You Sang Loud

And Smiled Back

You Forgave Him

But Spoke Out

You Did Good

Still Walked On

Not Gave Up.

YES YOU LIVED LIFE, JUST LIKE THAT.

PS- We are what choices we make, In the End Regret Not.

Life is lived, Just Like That.

LIFE ver 2.0.1.2

2012-01-01T09:45:00.000-08:00

Welcome 1-Jan-2012

For last year's words belong to last year's language
And next year's words await another voice.
And to make an end is to make a beginning.

~T.S. Eliot, "Little Gidding"

Could'nt agree more with the esteemed thinker/writer of 20th century.

What a perfect way to sum up a Year gone by.

World saw a transition, a change of yet another calender year. (2011-2012)

What actually changed? If at all anything did, would be our perspective. Maybe a will strong enough to accept and acknowledge - The Inevitable Metamorphosis.

Version 2.0.1.2 of life awaits you for better or for worse.

Perhaps New Years signify a collective decision of masses to change perspectives, habits and memories. In a world full of random experiences it becomes difficult to make choices and be selective in what we wish to learn/unlearn /erase from the year that passed us through. Do we let "bygones be bygones" or learn to value our experiences.

What to pick as valuable and what as worthless is going to determine what we become in Life as years go by as a social mandate.

No 365 days are the same and what we were last morning, we might not be this morning. New Years seem to be the time when we age psychologically and very suddenly so. On birthdays we are termed to age physically. Each year this day, I ponder and reflect the story of last 8760 hours that flew by me. How much was I able to hold on to? Not much. Qualitatively the year was not very enriching until it dawned this was as good as I could make it.

Last year , this day, I hoped that Life Ver 2.0.1.1 would be better than its yester-self.

Soon to realize that there will always be highs & lows, Life will be as unpredictable & will get more erratic as we grow grey. Every year looking into the mirror, something changes.

The quest to get better out of me becomes stronger while the fear to face another year lessens. This is what we call a Habit, though old habits die hard.

A year to realize that no thing and no one is irreplaceable.

A year to learn that with immense joys follow the deep crevasses of darkness.

A year to understand that permanence is temporary & temperance is mandatory.

A year where I met life in its raw ugly form and saw the best of me lost in the web.

A year where I knew every dark cloud had silver lining.

A year when I am unaware when the sun would shine.

A year where I am at peace with Life.

A year which will go down as dawning of eternal wisdom.

A year when journey became more important that the destination.

A year where all goals were blurred and new milestones appeared.

The year I grew up to LIFE.

To all those who stood by me , Its been a good one.

Am all set for another roller-coaster called 2012.

Virus struck, infected and cured. :)

Behold the light, behold the dark.

Swiftly in the sky I lark.

Up above the world so HIGH..Like a diamond and a Sigh..

2011-12-24T12:09:00.001-08:00

Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, How I wonder what you are?
Up above the world so high, Like a diamond and a Sigh.

Welcome to the world of Wonders.
Truly, there are many things money can buy, for everything else, share it with someone else. ;)

There is a world that awaits every woman which is beyond Love, Lust and beauty.
It is the world of Fashion, brands and diamonds. This is the world of Power. The reason for a real twinkle in the eye ;)

We are all little Starlets of our dreams. Being and feeling powerful for a woman manifests itself by her worldly possessions. I came across a rather interesting tweet,
" As kids, guys like cars and girls love Dolls. Strangely as they grow up, hobbies exchange , Men love Dolls & Women like Cars. "
Indeed very true.

Women are not shallow creatures, but they love to flaunt their possessions. Its a mark of achievement, borrowed (Hubby's) or earned. Lets meet some New Best Friends of Women. Its a trend fast catching up, the thirst to own Designer Brands and Solitaires. There is a price you pay to acquire assets- Drums of Money. Women today mind not being arm-candies , if wondrous delights keep falling into their laps with "Much Ado About Nothing." Today love speaks only one language- the language of money. You wish to proclaim your Lady Love for life, buy her whatever money can buy. It better be jewels, bags, anything designed by designers you can't properly pronounce/spell. This can never go wrong. :)

I wonder though, why is there so much hoopla around Big Bang Brands? Women can stand in ques for hours to own a KILLER PIECE by any leading fashion brand. What again was that?? ..E SAY LAUREN though its written as YVES SAINT LAURENT. It is a proper noun, so even if you pronounce it weirdly , why should eye-brows pop ? Why should one not raise an alarm when such brands charge a premium of more than 1000% on their products. I can sound phony, but I love these brands. I love them not for their quality or their unique offering , I love them because others envy these brands. Its out of reach of millions and offer me a world where I am defined not by WHO I AM, but by WHAT I HAVE. Yes, we are somewhat shallow and are perfectly fine with this.

My new CGPA is not Cumulative Grade Point Average, a mere number. But it can be Cavalli- Gucci-Prada-Armani. Who would not wish to be high on this materialistic definition? Everyone and anyone who can afford it. These immaterial possessions amount to an average of more than 30% HH spends in affluent families. Not only are these confidence boosters , they also amount to quick social upgradation into the world of Page 3 which is "Up above the world so high".

A Daimond studded pretty hostess, at a Party , in a chic knee-length classic designer LBD is to die for, is'nt it? Now I am sure you would not ask, what is LBD? Hmm...Little Black Dress it is. A must have for any woman who sees a Starlet in herself. Such small nothings, which cost a million bucks also grab a million eyeballs. Hence, in terms of Cost Benefit analysis, this is a sound investment & no other asset can possibly give such an instant gratification- The marvelous twinkling eyes which are exactly the color of Envy.

This is the world where Riches are honored and revered not education. Our aspirations are not to be noble and kind, but to look like a Million Dollar baby. ;) This is no mark of Shallowness , but about arriving in life. What if I cannot name the brands the way world does, as long as the world is at my feet, do I need to worry? Sometimes even the most intelligent and poised souls have to speak the language of money, just to get their way through the shine of hollow jewels as "all that glitters is not gold".

Even if I love to subscribe to the means of the world and make a guest appearance on "World's stage" , I would rather be playing a role which makes people wonder about that "Cute Classy thing" if not a "Drop-dead gorgeous hottie". Atleast I can Make My Mark. Whatever you splurge on, make sure " You're worth it" , because in the end someone will see through you and ask you, "Is it Real?" and instantly all cameras will turn away from you to another Starlet of Substance.

We forget that those Brands are what we make them. A world you do not know of, will never matter to you.
This is a symbiotic relationship. None will survive without the other. A world which is built on perceptions of everything which will not make sense to you in a simple life. High Heels, all made up dolls, polished bodies and bluffing smiles welcome you seldom. For those crazy moments of life, keep the actress in you alive. Treat life like a red-carpet someday, live your dream as a Diva sometimes. Indulgence is good, Love yourself without a Sigh. Afterall, you live once , "Its your life, make it large". ;)

Ladies, Make hay while the Sun shines, and Save the Twinkle of your eyes.
You decide the worth of a brand, Rest you will see in the Eyes of your Man.

PS- Now that we only understand the language of Money, Save a drum of Cash for the needy, it can get you blessings and goodwill.
(Whoever thought all that social service is for benefit of humanity, knows nothing about regrets of a Shopaholic. )

Boyz II Men - On Bended Knee

2011-12-17T12:26:00.000-08:00

Writer: HARRIS III, JAMES / LEWIS, TERRY

Darlin' I can't explain,

where did we lose our way Girl,

it's drivin' me insane
and I know I just need one more chance to prove my love to you

If you come back to me I guarantee that I'll never let you go.

Can we go back to the days our love was strong.

Can you tell me how a perfect love goes wrong.

Can somebody tell me how you get things back the way it used to be
Oh God give me the reason, I'm down on bended knees
I'll never walk again until you come back to me
I'm down on bended knees.

Darlin' I can't explain, where did we lose our way Girl,
it's drivin' me insane and
I know I just need one more chance to prove my love to you
If you come back to me I guarantee that I'll never let you go.
can we go back to the days our love was strong.
Can you tell me how a perfect love goes wrong.
Can somebody tell me how you get things back the way it used to be
Oh God give me the reason, I'm down on bended knees
I'll never walk again until you come back to me
I'm down on bended knees.

Gonna swallow my pride,
say I'm sorry,
stop pointing fingers,
the blame is on me
I want a new life and
I want it with you
If you feel the same don't ever let it go.
You gotta believe in the spirit of love
It can heal all things we won't hurt anymore
No, I don't believe our loves terminal.
I'm down on my knees, begging you please come home.

Darlin' I can't explain, where did we lose our way Girl,
it's drivin' me insane
and I know I just need one more chance to prove my love to you
If you come back to me I guarantee that I'll never let you go.
can we go back to the days our love was strong.
Can you tell me how a perfect love goes wrong.
Can somebody tell me how you get things back the way it used to be
Oh God give me the reason, I'm down on bended knees

I'll never walk again until you come back to me I'm down on bended knees.
So many nights I dream of you Holding my pillow tight
I know I don't need to be alone
When I open up my eyes To face reality
Every moment without you seems like eternity
I'm begging yo, begging you, come back to me

Amazing Song and Lyrics.

DamseLLs in Distress

2011-12-17T12:05:00.000-08:00

"When the going gets tough, tough gets the going"
And then they say, That's the way it is.

Seriously, when in doubt flowing with the flow is apparently the toughest task. Nonetheless its also the best way out. Doubt is a state of self-deception, where sense of right-wrong blurs and we experience dichotomy of split self. That is the Life of a Woman. Anyhow, the day we are born, we experience pangs of eternal confusion.

From a tiny toddler, to an aging wrinkled mind not even a second goes by without the thought , " That's the way it is??" Bound in the social milieu "Fairer Sex" goes through mental and physical evolution with grace and dignity because this is how it should be. Struggling through so many ifs and butts (Literally) , acceptance of Status-Quo becomes imperative. In tight situations one ought to sound socially viable, we behave not in our natural way, but altered reactions are given precedence.

I often wonder , in case reactions to situations were more real, would course of our lives been any different from what we are today? Would there be lesser burden of an entangled life?

How exciting it would have been to enjoy your Ice lolly with the same exalting sigh in front of zillions of people as you would do alone.

"Days of the month" ( This is a classic term for teenage guys to get cheap thrills) when reporting late to work, you can tell your superiors that " hey, did not feel like coming to work early" , knowing they would never hold it up against you and would not think like 15 year old guys. (Trust me, its both)

For all the Chocolate lovers ;) , while the first decadent piece goes into the mouth, can we not give the orgasmic reaction in a 5 Star restaurant as well. ( For Chiclets who do not like Chocs, I am sure there are many other indulging foods for you) . Because we love chocolates so much , let us enjoy it at peace.

Why are we to be our altered selves invariably always ?? Oops the Social Stigma.
The Indian Society has consciously bound Women into a mold of being " Mannequins of Desirability" . Carefree lives of innocent smiles are trampled around early teens. The best guy friends suddenly ought to become acquaintances. In case you are blessed with desirable physical traits in your teens, it has to be guarded. There is strict check on the company kept, the clothes worn and the social conduct. The evolution process being so taxing emotionally /physically for the EVES but that is the Law of nature. Decision on hobbies, interests and personality is decided by custodians of Budding Damsels who will forever be in Distress.

Outlook in Metros is more Liberal towards the Fairer Sex . (Ohh...Its a blessing every parent asks for, to have a Fair, BeautifuLL and DutifuLL Daughter). Our lives are Full of calculations right from the day realization of Feminity dawns on us. The reason being " Times are bad, you need to keep yourself safe from any harm". The harm happens usually from the same men who inhabit the society as best guy friends being kids. No fault of theirs, but instantly all love, friendship , passion & care becomes too unnerving once female company from being a constant becomes a luxury. As a 10-12 year old your next door friend Pinky , at 20 becomes Pinks ;) . Yes , the female charms work wonders on macho/cute Guys. Parents keep a tight watch, on age/weight/clothes while Our Young Princesses actually embark on their independent journey of life.

Of whatever aspirations we have, luckily education has been recognized and encouraged even in a Girl Child. Fairly fairing better with books, women are now being pushed out of the realms of Typecasts (only superficially) and given a chance to prove themselves. Ironically, once the Princesses start to relish their independence with obvious glitches, Its time for the Kings to take over their lives. For whatever I have decoded, this independence is a sham. The social stigmas are so complex that a woman in the end has to unknowingly succumb happily to the chains of domesticity. This for the first time looks like the Fairy tale to our damsels, Dream Prince/King awaiting in his Golden Chariot often carved out of the toils of her parents.
Yes , Its the start of a new phase of servitude (Lucky Woman= Served by Men/Man= Joru ka Ghulaam).

The new life starts with meeting social expectations, taxing parents with price of large scale weddings, appeasing future family and so forth. Eventually , Career will take a backseat in case family is a priority. If family is not a priority, this is not a balanced woman. A woman in order to prove her mettle , will balance perfectly between being a homemaker and a butter winner. Hardly can a woman be accepted and respected being a bread-earner. Her income would invariably be considered as icing on the cake. Going the family way, physical toils make it impossible to carry career aggressively. Women at work till settled are taken seriously but moreso casually. One in a thousand is lucky enough to be given a chance to be as successful as her potential.
Being tender hearted soul, she would eventually give up her career, passions and life for her family.

At the moment , holding her infant daughter in her hand she would think, " I would give her a better life than mine, with all opportunities life can offer. She will be a free bird & live to the fullest. " While a parallel thought would seep in, we have to start saving for her marriage, " God give her a nice and loving husband".

In a moment, the closed fist of the infant girl already has the destiny written , she will be the DamseLL in Distress.

PS- Its a pleasure to be around a sunny , chirpy and bubbly girl. Always keep her alive even at 70 years. I have the pleasure of having the best Parents who have given me ample opportunities but with discretion. At heart, all women know, That's the way it is. :)
Make the Best of Your Potential.

Awakened !!

2011-12-17T05:29:00.000-08:00

I know that voice

Voicing me

My engrossed mind

Mindless, left me.

I hear you well enough

Enough to ignore

Ignoring you is bliss

Bliss, abandoned me.

I tried not hard

Hardly ever valued

Value of dreams

Dreamy, Sleepless me.

I am indifferent

Indifference i have for you

You are my truth

Truly, lying to me.

I was told to believe

Believe in being right

Right now only you

You, bereaving me.

I now can feel your voice

Voice of tranquil silence

Silence only I heard

Heard, Audible me.

I am Awake

Awakened by the crack

Crack-up of senses

Sensing, the numb me.

I am Alive

Alive to be

Being animated to witness

Witness wonders of this world

World of fluttering wings

Winged & glowing dreams

Dreamy eyes on swings

Swinging into fairy land

Land of Goblins and Knights

Night of glowing lights, of faith

Faith in your being

Being one with you.

I AM AWAKE !!!

PS - To the spirit of being alive.

Marriage- The Big Fat Arrangement

2011-12-16T09:03:00.001-08:00

When any young man or woman breaks news of Marriage into Closer or Indifferent Social Circles, The inevitable question is " Is it Arranged or Love?"

Unknowingly and unconsciously , there are strange perceptions immediately built around a single reply................ " Its Love" followed by Sighs and Awwwww.

Unluckily if , " Its Arranged" , the counter reactions are congrats-great. All the best.

There is a certain perceptual success attributed in the mere congratulatory tone. Arrangements are always looked down upon. For the lucky ones who do not go through the toil of strange situations, LOVE IT IS, usually not a guaranteed happily ever-after.

Arranged gigs are always characterized by sudden awkwardness and too many rolling eyes prying to judge the prospective Bride or Groom. As they say "That's a Classic". If at all there is a more nerve wrecking situation than this, it is surely comparable to being embarrassed in a public gathering , where everyone notices and acknowledges your Moment of Awkwardness.

"Estranged with strangers" can be an apt State of Mind for all participants in such a social setting. Settling down is seen as a mark of personal achievement. If its Love, then obviously its passing with Distinction. Rest are merely categorized as "Unlucky In love" or "Too busy/ugly for Love".

Matchmaking is one of the oldest known professions prevalent across the world. If Matching tones/hues you become a designer; Matching concrete with sensibilities makes you an Architect; in case you match voice and expressions would result into a singer; match tact with eccentricities you are a Politician. We all are chronic Match makers. We love the art of linking thoughts, particles and people. Weaving a fairy world which gives pleasure to others- we all are SOCIAL SERVANTS indeed.

Requiring social linkages to fulfill a personal sense of completion indeed should raise some eye brows and lucky enough to bat some eye-lashes ;)

Here we meet in the institution of Marriage where goods and books of accounts are exchanged for social recognition & security.

Post the initial phase of discomfort, there is not much difference between LOVE which is arranged/nurtured after self-sacrifice or Arrangement of Love facilitated by Family/Friends. The "First Meeting" and the ice- breaking is most taxing; in majority of the cases a second rendezvous is not asked for. Why??

Not all arrangements work, this mostly takes a blow on delicate balance of Self Esteem of prospective candidates who are already tagged socially "Unlucky in Love" . The prince/princesses whose Facebook status still reads "Single". Yes, rejections are very common in such social arrangements , as it is not a choice-less world. Girls can choose from Smart looks to Diamonds/jewels and custom search for a suitable match. Guys can screen vital stats to mental sanity to social acceptance criterion of the Brides to be.

Myth- Is it possible to even know anyone guy/girl and their families when they are at their cordial best??

Two hoots to anyone who thinks the man or woman you marry will not change drastically. New age liberal parents dictate the terms of Prospects liking each other and various permutation-combination are worked out around that. Mature individuals searching for a life-partner ascertain what they never understood in the past- WHO IS THE ONE?

The entire affair looks like an effort to pass while cheating in an examination where aides are family members. The competition is not less in this field as well. Marriage & Weddings are the most flourishing businesses in the Indian Social set up.

Young guns not only have to fulfill the demands of their partners but also fight the might of Bank Balance, Beauty and Brains. The competition is neck to neck, to entice a better mate into wedlock. Emotional Turbulence, Futile Conversations, Deliberate Smiles and False Impressions leave a sense of void inside. Because sadly, actual movie starts post the wedding. These Revelations and Tribulations would be well comprehended by more experienced lot. The sorry situations are when arranged set-ups leave a fear in the minds of young men and women. Unknown rejections are like flunking in Group Discussions or Personal Interview which has to be taken VERY PERSONALLY.

Non-involved parties often punch in a casual remark, " You reject some, some reject you."

Easier said than done. The crack in self-esteem is as severe as a rejection in love affair. When the opposite gender's rejection is based on superficial facts and assumptions their maturity is seriously a question mark. Deep down an inkling always present, What happened? Did it not go right?

Blabbering into meaningless conversations which almost sound like exchanging biographies and gauging immediate expert reactions, prospects go through alot of turmoil in the screening stage. The only clarity is that both parties are willing to settle into a business called The Big Fat Arrangement. Painful situations when almost verbal promises are not adhered to. Uncertainty and confusion mar the thinking of mature minds. As there is no social obligation, courtesy and social etiquettes are conveniently forgotten in case of rejections. Yes, bringing your moment of Social Awkwardness into the public eye. In the smallest examination, we always are aware how we fared, in an arranged set up, no report card is shared only a final Fail, which is not even willingly communicated.

I suggest use of a Social Scorecard for an arranged marriage situation.

To avoid embarrassing situations, families exchange Social report cards of Self and prospects. This leads to meeting of prospects and marking desirability factors in the Scorecard. As this is a stranger, honest feedback needs to be shared which is exchanged in the Score Card in the first meeting. The result instantly and scientifically shared entailing possibility of a second meeting in case of favorable outcome. So on and so forth. This seems to be a more cordial and scientific approach to the whole Confusion and Hype created around such unnerving social encounters.

A nod of rejection is remarkably different from a sigh of acceptance. Sigh is more of a relief than happiness that Finalllyyyy..."Meet the Lovely Couple".

Most bizarre unions also receive Social comments like - Cute and Made for Each-Other. It is weird how 2 individuals and their families apparently bond with so much of Artificial Warmth initially. Knowingly or unknowingly, with usually tender hearts these fake moments turn into genuine care, love and respect gradually. Don't be too gullible to ever believe, that this would be happily ever after.

But as they say , "Someone , somewhere is made for you" .

This is not just true for the person you marry but also the family of the partner. We all eventually bump into The One. Most of us live oblivious of the fact that Marriages do not work because two individuals are compatible. These institutions right from the outset prepare us to deal with uncertainties and discomfort. It prepares us for The real Life.

A successful Marriage is waiting for you outside your comfort zone and inside your effort zone.

For all the Golden Jubilee Wedding Anniversaries attended , I have always observed, what worked was the WILL to keep interest of your better-half before yours. Wonders happen , when the feeling is Mutual. Yes , then they say, " Allz well that ends well"

Word of Caution- Do not go in for Photo shops and character editing, word polishing etc. Just be yourself. For all the ones striving to strike gold, always keep in mind, THE ONE WILL OFTEN WALK THAT EXTRA MILE FOR YOU ;)

(Do remember not to expect that Always )

India - Corruption OF the People, BY the People & FOR the People

2011-04-08T11:11:00.000-07:00

I heard so much of hoopla around a Noble man Anna Hazare going on hunger strike to fight for the people of this Democratic India.
Trigger- Recent scams & money laundering with government silently pushing the dirt under the Great Indian Carpet. I feel its a waste to fight for the Indian Public. We are all equally spineless and are living a life of sheer convenience where we do not mind paying extra for luxuries, paying extra for education even paying extra for love. Of course all in purely ILLEGAL SENSE.

The reality is we are an adulterated lot - Mind, Body & Soul. The voice raised against the Corrupt leaders is not going to solve anything. Prosecuting them will not stop corruption.
What is CORRUPTION?? Cor·rup·tion [kuh-ruhp-shuhn] –noun
1. the act of corrupting or state of being corrupt.
2. moral perversion; depravity.
3. perversion of integrity.
4. corrupt or dishonest proceedings.
5. bribery.
6. debasement or alteration, as of language or a text.
7. a debased form of a word.
8. putrefactive decay; rottenness.
9. any corrupting influence or agency

Look closely, everyday in our lives we see one or the other form of corruption. From Education, Industries, Hospitality, Services to Sports and even Poverty corruption has seeped into our blood.

THE INDIAN DNA- GENE CORRUPTION X
I am supposed to respect the ways of BIG CORPORATES. Watch them prosper by seeing the amount of Lobbying and money power used to grow their business illegally. And why?? They would generate employment. If building money in India was this easy we would have had a multi-millionaire in every 10 metres distance.

We want to Buy a Darshan to Vaishnodevi. VVIP darshan?? What is happening in this country?? It is a hopeless lot. The honest are beaten when they file an RTI. False cases, allegations & below standard mentality is ruling every heart of India.

When we won the World Cup, cricketers were given Crores of money, What about other athletes who won medals in Common Wealth?? Just mere Lakhs!!! Why this disparity? Why this discrimination?? Is this not the responsibility of the state not to encourage inequality and promote all sports. Why give cricketers flats & lands? Is it actually recognition of their achievement or an act to please & appease. And is this not public's money?? Are we being asked where we want this to be spent??

Many times in life, we compromise by accepting the flouted norms. We are scared that if we do not give in to the system, system will throw us out. We go with the Dirty Flow, pollute our soul & kill our conscience. For a nursery admission, Govt makes some point system and schools do not honor them. Is there anyone to listen & take an action?? NOOOOO Right to education is merely a sham.In the name of education, it is a money laundering process. It is a Vicious Circle.

The name of the Game is POM. Its core ingredients are POWER, OBLIGATION & MONEY. Politicians accept monies and power of corporates throughout the year.
What corruption does??
It kills all the means of opportunities. Its a facade to hide development, to transform thinking rationally to illogical opinions. We are not now corrupt by actions but A NATION CORRUPTED AT HEART & THOUGHT. Corruption takes away the POWER TO THINK & OBLIGES US TO ACCEPT MONEY LATER OBLIGING US FURTHER TO RETURN A FAVOR.

To get critical decision sanctioned by Govt, Corporates oblige them. From Press to Media whatever we see as objective is nothing but opinionated & judgemental piece of news.Our school text books are colored with political undertones.

If you are in the forest only the Wild survive not the fittest. Animals who work on instincts are interested in creating controversies rather than policies. Oops Not a forest but a zoo. from what we eat to wear to think and act is CONTROLLED.
Till the time a ANNA HAZARE is'nt pointing towards us, he is one of Us. Else like Gandhi he will also find rivals. Whoever still thinks we are a Democracy??

We are too many wrongs together making it right. The might of a state/caste seeking reservations for totally undeserving people. Why should anyone have any right to destroy public properties, halt Indian Railways, stop traffic on roads to raise voice for something they do not even deserve an inch.

We fight all our lives for an Opportunity . An opportunity to be heard, understood & recognized Professionally or in Life. When Abraham Lincoln thought of Democracy OF, BY & FOR the People, he was never wrong.
Democracy is what the citizens make it.

Corruption is not what an ANNA HAZARE can eliminate alone. Corruption is a monster which is now bigger than OUR COMBINED WILL & ACTION. India is in its final stage of decay. We have transgressed all forms of corruption.
Majority of India is not propagating corruption, but as a breed we are silent and mute. We are attached to our families to an extent that we only think about them. Property is cars, houses, assets and not knowledge & goodness.

There are deserving, noble men & women who will glitter amongst fake jewels. Unfortunately, in life wrong stones make it to the crown & real gems often remain unknown. It is not a time to be jealous, there are blessed individuals who descend to make a difference, who are beyond any hunger for recognition. Those for whom life is not about them & their achievements but a thirst to think beyond themselves.
AND A DISCOVERY or AN INVENTION?? We all have that person inside of us. If we are not monsters, we are slaves. Corruption has killed the ANGEL in us.

TO KILL THE MONSTROSITY OF CORRUPTION INDIA WILL HAVE TO REINCARNATE AS A COLLECTIVE FORCE TO CHANGE.
Else Corruption will corrupt Minds OF people, BY our Actions and For our Generations to come.

AS NEHRU SAID, " At the stroke of the midnight hour, when the world sleeps, India will awake to life and freedom. A moment comes, which comes but rarely in history, when we step out from the old to the new, when an age ends, and when the soul of a nation, long suppressed, finds utterance." It will hold true again.

I WILL WAIT FOR THE AWAKENING , FREEDOM NOT FROM A FOREIGN RULE BUT FROM OUR MONSTERS. TILL THEN I AM THE CHANGE I CAN BRING.

JAI HIND

SACHIN TENDULKAR..THE GOD I KNOW

2011-04-03T03:04:00.000-07:00

I have seen him cry, rejoice, succeed, struggle, in pain and I have seen him ecstatic.
The God I know has not looked away from his responsibilities and more than often has been Selfless. We have heard about Jesus, Krishna, Shiv, Guru Nanak, Sai Baba who transcended all barriers to command respect of millions & billions of humans. On the contrary, there have been many exemplary mortals who were close to perfection like Gandhi ji, Mother Teresa who made a difference in lives of so many mere humans.

I was born in the year when India Won its First World Cup. Unaware of the excitement , happiness and Indian-ness in me, I was living like a mediocre cricket fan for a very longtime. More than that I was living like a mediocre being. Then a day came, when I found my religion..My God and My Idol in Sachin. It was not an enlightenment, but it was once in a Job Interview back during my Graduation when I realized , YES I HAVE A MAN I WANT TO BE LIKE WHEN I DIE, THAT IS SACHIN TENDULKAR. WHY IS HE WORSHIPPED & WHY IS HE AN IDOL??

It is not about his game & about Cricket. It is frankly about the Character & Steel that he is made of. As a young gun, he did not forget his path like Kambli. A perfect differentiator of where HUMILITY can take you in life. Don't fly high, just keep running on with Honesty.

Some men tell us its not about the Power of your Surname, the position & Social status inherited. In my life I have lost many a battles to more deserving people, to more influential people, to prettier faces and attractive women. I have never believed in failing against a Corrupt or a bad human being. They are not a threat to me.We might not be in the most beneficial & conducive circumstances mostly in life (This goes for the common man like us) , but our Will & Efforts can turn tables sooner or later. 5 years down the line I will learn more from like of Dhoni, Saina or maybe Rahul Gandhi. Their time is yet to come, as they are to achieve more than what they have done today.

I do not know about the game much, what is On side/off side, gully, Long on/long off?Thankfully I do know what matters. What is money, Fame, Success maybe nothing in front of a sound sleep after you give your 100% to anything that you do in life. A wish of God to hold the World Cup and his dream had instilled conviction in young stars like Kohli, Yuvraj, Gambhir and many others. Indeed they are honored to have played with Sachin and would be extremely blessed if they learn one/two traits from THE MAN.

BALANCE- To keep the extremes in harmony. Aggression vs Patience with a heart to take Success & Failure in the same stride. Being aware of our strengths & weaknesses. Respecting fate & having the undying belief in Self. Rock solid commitment, passion & perseverance. Saying your heart out with utter simplicity leaving no scope for any bitterness or animosity. Making criticism a TO-DO List rather than a I Hate the Critic. To be 35+ , and still running around the field with enthusiasm of a Teen, I applaud Sachin for training not only his body, passion, talent , character but also his MIND & SPIRIT.

Sachin is a Visionary. He saw India winning the Cup like Gandhi saw India getting Independence. Conviction & Faith as much as being subjective are contagious & Inspiring. I am a NOBODY, but A MAN has inspired me to most of all BE HONEST. Honest to the people in my life, to my profession, to my talents and to my goals.

Yes there are times I want to be Cunning, Clever, Jugaadu & might love to give -in to small temptations and get my way through. I would get the end result once, twice but what would it do to me in future? People would give me back what I gave them jugaad, betrayal & below quality behavior. In India, there are millions of gallons of Talent, optimism, love, hope, faith, honesty. If we even realize 1% of its potential it can lead to many such moments like THE NIGHT OF 2nd APRIL 2011 for INDIA.

Sachin might not have built an empire like Arcelor Mittal or the Ambanis. He has surely built a Nation which will rise against any adversity, pain, struggle & rough patch to enthuse GODNESS (self devised term) into billions of humans who will strive to be like THE SACHIN TENDULKAR. He is a man to be studied and understood. In SACHIN- Hopeless can find hope, Failures can find success, Strugglers can love the pain, Achievers can become humble, Rich can rise above Ferraris & assets to value equality & rise above status-quo, Dishonest can have guilt and Zillions can have a YARDSTICK to measure actual success.

WE CAN BECOME MORE PERFECT AS A HUMAN BY UNDERSTANDING THIS MAN-SACHIN. FOR THOSE WHO DO NOT HAVE A RELIGION, CAN HAVE A REAL EXAMPLE OF DOs & DONTs of life to follow.

SACHIN IS THE MODERN DAY GOD, WHO WILL SIT IN THE MOST EXPENSIVE CARS, IN THE MOST AMAZING ATTIRE & STILL GIVE THAT INNOCENT SMILE WITHOUT ANY AIRS.

Everyday is not our best day, if we give our best shot to atleast one deed that we do in a day, we will achieve more than what we dreamt of.

OH MY GOD, "WHAT AN INSPIRATION, WHAT A MAN"

The ohh soo common..Onions!!

2010-12-21T04:55:00.000-08:00

Veggie Delight..OOOOONIONS!!!

I love Onions!!!! I can't live without it.

Given a choice Onions in food is as important as Shelter & clothing to many of the Indians.

Eating out has shown an uptrend since 2007. And Onions are one ingredient which find place in any cuisine with ease.

Ever since I had the pleasure of eating burgers, noodles, chaat & anything which is Edible...I have loved Onions from the bottom of my heart. There should be an ONION DAY to show solidarity towards this amazing creation of nature.

Onion is what Mango is to fruits & gold to jewelry.

Onion is Rs 75/ kg which is like making a choice between 3 Ferrero Rochers or A Bournville.

Though this is Deja-vu and same had happened with Sugar, Salt, LPG, Airfares etc.

Its very startling to see there are so many patterns which are almost Fads.

Who bears the brunt of it? Obviously the majority viz Common Man.

Common man is Santa Banta of the Jokes world, we are the centre of all laughing matter.

A country where "Belly rules the mind", its unjustified to see prices of vegetables soar so high.

One crucial question one needs to ask, what happened to government's price controlling mechanism.

Feeding on our empty stomachs & dying hopes the money laundering process goes on.

Common staple diet is anything but available to the Common Man.

Maybe like other developed economies, feeding on the Live(Stock) should be what India will have to do.

The common man is stuck in evils of the money laundering eagerly waiting to be saved by the god of vegatables..ONIONS.

The question is not if prices of onions will slash down, the question is Can Onions make the culprits WEEP?? Lets hope so. :)

Stairway to heaven: A journey to Haidakhan

2010-01-13T01:15:00.001-08:00

Haidakhan - Beauty of this place is spectacular. One would be awestruck after reaching this place. Located in the foothills of Himalayas ie the Kumaon range, Haidakhan is of religious importance known as Haidakhan Vishwamahadham after Baba Haidakhan.

Haidakhan remains unheard and unknown to majority of travelers. It is a 3 hrs diversion from Rambagh railway station on the way to Nanital (Uttaranchal). The journey uphill is ecstatic and memorable. For anyone who enjoys serenity and calmness would cherish the journey as well as the destination.

The long stretch to reach my destination was full of surprises. It was like a suspense, like life. Every turn gave a novel view, something different. At a point, a feeling to have lost the way. There is no one to help, no guidance , just a gut feeling that this is the right way. Roads look untraveled & we head into a pathless destination.

Twittering of birds, dense forests and tiny roads create a sense of adventure.Haidakhan is known for the Ashram of Baba Haidakhan. The likes of Priyanka Chopra take an annual visit to the place. A brief history of the place: Haidakhan Baba, who is also known by many other names such as Kanchopi Topa Baba, is considered by many to be the same person as Mahavatar Babaji who initiated Lahiri Mahasay in 1861. This account is quite famous because it is well documented in Paramahamsa Yogananda’s autobiography. He received the name “Haidakhan Baba” because he was often seen in the Kumaon region of the Himalayan foothills in a village known as Haidakhan. These appearances mainly occurred between 1800-1922.

The main attraction of the place is the Ashram which is beautifully managed by the Pandits. Many toiurists visit Haidakhan during Sep-Oct when its at the peak of its beauty. The wide riverbed fills up with shallow water & to visit the Main Temple one has to walk barefoot on the riverbed making it an entrhalling experience. The crystal clear water gurgles which makes us aware of the Power of Nature & its immense beauty. Parallel to the riverbed runs a well kept flowerbed where one can find rare & exotic flowers.

The Temple has a long series of giant bells (Mandir Ghantas) which creates a heavenly music and echoes amidst the mighty mountains mingling with the softness of twirling water & fragnance of exotic flora.Only a handful of local people in Nainital & surroundings are aware about Haidakhan. The place might look very mundane & lacking all attractions of a big city/tourist destination, but its worth the experience.

There are no fancy restaurants present. A meal at the Ashram dhaba or Maggi & chips makes it a very enjoyable experience. I am not sure if ever in my lifetime I would see that place again. The imprints of some places & people are so strong that they always remain engraved in our memory. The journey to Haidakhan, my stay for 5 hours there & after 2 years all seems so fresh.

When small stream-lets sift underneath our feet. When holy bells create an enchanted harmony with breath-taking mountains. I would just say that " Heaven is under our feet as well as over our heads".

At the Stairway to heaven there is No Snow, No Rivers, No Fancy Trees , No Comforts. There is just a mere human thankful for everything. At a Stairway to heaven there are no regrets , no worries , no success & nothing that money can buy.

There are some places which you don't remember visiting & some which you never forget. At a Stairway to Heaven you just love where you are. If in daily life we carry this feeling around, It would be a Bliss.

Till then take those Stairs & Be healthy - Body & Soul.

Revisting Lucknow: The City of Nawabs

2010-01-04T02:48:00.000-08:00

City of Nawabs is now transformed into a modern day metro. With malls, restaurants & hang out joints, Lucknow is catching up fast.

The city stands divided & yet looks one-The Old Lucknow & the New Lucknow. Of course there is one Lucknow next to Taj Hotel which looks like Maya's Luck(y)Now. Part of the city has now turned into a political fortress thanks to Mayawati. The capital city boasts of concrete structures built by Madam Maya which look more majestic than all wax of Tussads put together.

Image Credits - Wikipedia

A year back during Christmas I visited the city. In cold foggy mornings the sparse rays of sun reached us sparingly as food reaches poor in a Nawabi Daawat. Far from the hustle bustle of the country capital, state capitals and towns still show dying signs of peace.

Lucknow is known for Tunde Kebabs which are a delight for taste buds. Famous Tunde of Chawk area melt in our mouths with a lingering flavor. Lanes into lanes, the oldest area of Lucknow is nothing less than a maze. From beggars to richly clad all earn their livelihood in the city with ease. For foodies, its a paradise . We can safely call it the KEBAB LAND. Rich flavors of Seekh, Shaami , Biryanis and Tikkas instill sense of greed instantly.

From Kebabs to Sweet delights, we live the legacy of being in a multicultural city with fine tastes for music, arts bejeweled with beautiful gardens. Overseeing banks of Gomti river, hustle bustle of the city still shows glimmering signs of Lucknowi pride in the local dialect.

Winters mornings are best served at nukkads with chai and freshly fried samosas, pakodas topped with jalebis courtesy local halwai. Even in cold foggy days, warm hearts of residents make it a pleasant experience. Not to forget the hooligans around , pretty lasses be careful. Men in the city are young at heart ;)

Gluttony and lethargy can be your best friends in this City. Unfortunate ones can miss the famous Radhe ke boondi ladoos and the special preparation called Makhan Malai sold early mornings in Chowk .

Lucknowi kadai- Embroidery is world renowned. Tiny dots make patterns which eyes can dote on and marvel the fine craftsmanship. Plush colors to soothing pastel shades entice all visitors passing by the ever jammed lanes of flooded markets. There is enough rich cotton to drape as Sarees, Suits for women and tiny tots . Versions of trendy Kurtas and bandgala for men and kids.

The rich historical heritage - Bhool Bhulaiya, British Residency, Bada and Chota Imambara. The monuments stood tall to be pride of the city. Now unfortunately can be reduced to ruins in the hands of commercialization. Since the days of Famous revolt of 1857, the city tells numerous tales of its rich struggle. This has translated into dialect and Lakhnawi Tehzeeb.

You feel richer as fabric of the city makes your heart peaceful, happier and joyous. The "Golden city of East" somewhere would make you feel at home. A warm welcoming embrace beckons you for your next visit.... Till then, Aadab.

WHITE TERROR

2009-08-04T07:32:00.000-07:00

White-the Divine hue
Light of peace
Aroma of a blossom
Oh!!!! The bright celestial sheen

A pristine touch of life
Blush of tranquil sky.
Grace of innocence
Nature’s flowing fence.
Aphrodite and doves
Chariots and billows.
Mermaids in sea-foam
Plunge in achromatic glow.

White-the Divine hue
Light of peace
Aroma of a blossom
Oh!!!! The bright celestial sheen

Dawn of twilight
Graying of night.
Hounds in the dark
Mortals aghast.
Mother’s holy veil
Naïve infant’s dream
Adieu: radiant reverie.
Lost- the Divine hue
Invisible peace
Aroma of fear
Oh!!!! Fading celestial sheen

Scarlet clots in the past
Mute crimson glow in dark.
Stillness of vicious shock
Corpses in each dock.
Shrieks, shouts and shadows
Weapons & their ruins in meadows
Pearly candescence in ashes.

Ominous- the Divine hue
Gruesome peace
Aroma of terror
Oh!! Dismembered celestial sheen

Faithless folks
Fatal fights.
Miming muse
Strident silence.
Lost lives
Rescued rights.
Doomed desires
Daffodil dreams.

In shock & fright
I in sleepless nights.
Body & Soul
Trembling & Crippled.
Killed Peace & Nurtured Terror
Fostered Maniacs & Divine Monsters.
This is our ruin & this is our Land
These are our meadows & our dying clan.
No religion & no caste exists
No Terror in Black & Red in this mist.

Liberty-the Divine hue
Cherished freedom
Aroma of bliss
Oh!! Novel celestial sheen

As India Celebrates the 63^rd Independence Day on 15 Aug 2009

The "D" Generation

2009-03-09T02:45:00.000-07:00

Welcome to the world of The Young & The Restless.

I was exposed to the world of a modern Devdas through DEV D, Delhi Belly & LSD. All looked to be excellent movies which talked about the Urban Youth & their lives.

Not likely to be understood & loved by all, not even all of our D Generation. The Dev Ds living in the midst of Delhi belly practicing LSD are all Men & women of a new league. There are reasons however to be what they want to be. Nothing that they are ashamed of or are scared of. This is the reality. There is the fun in being what they choose to be.

It seems a common trend which sets right from late teens & continues till eternity unless choices & decisions & outlook change towards life. WHAT IS THIS TREND? WHO ARE THEY? AND WHAT DIFFERENT CHOICES HAVE THEY MADE?

This is the future of India which is making easy choices, opting for convenient lifestyles & avoiding the struggle in life because they are just not BOTHERED . Ones not baffled by ruthlessness of life.

Surprisingly, its not all that bad to be De Generated in life. There is something very admirable in being a mindless youth. Their WILL & CRISIS MANAGEMENT skills are extra ordinary. We see all path breakers discovering something different (for good or for bad).

We lose what is to be preserved, PEACE & TRANQUILITY. Of all the pros & cons, all the youth takes away is just simple joys. It leaves us at crossroads to crucial decisions. Life Changing & Life Threatening decisions. Of all the D Generation only those flourish who either use their WILL to Right places or ones whose Parents are resourceful enough to turn wrongs into right. Rest of all just manage being average & blaming their colorful past for a bland future.

After all, is it worth it?? YES INDEED. We are all on a journey to self discovery & understanding more than us- LIFE. Its a pity if you never lost your way, its a pity not to ever have seen a dead end & of course a pity if none came to rescue.

This is the fun of being young. This is the age to commit follies so that ages later we can laugh at being a part of the " D GENERATION" . Its good to be young ..is'nt it !!!!!!

Of all said and done, we do want to be sure we have interesting tales to tell the next De- generated lot.

P S - Only Follies are acceptable nothing more than that. :)

Hide & Seek with Delhi Winters

2009-01-10T08:58:00.000-08:00

One of the best times to enjoy New Delhi is in Winters.
The fog, smog and early morning dew just makes me fall in love with Delhi all over again.

At night the chilly winds, the silent streets and bon-fire at various corners of small colonies makes me feel like am at an isolated hill station. The city looks inert and frozen and pleasently silent. A silence which is not threatening but re assuring. Small inroads engulfed by sheets of fog and hazy street lights add to the beauty of watching time go by in chilly nights.

In the hours of sleepy darkness, feeling the chilly winds & watching the misty stars shining doubles the zeal when I see a sunny day. The street dogs do not look mist struck at all!! They find refuge under the cars, basements where the monsters of mist can't reach them.
The undying spirit of Delhites to face cold & frosty winds with a smile shows their endurance .

The beautiful January mornings where Sunrays filter through layers of haze to reach the inhabitants spreads warmth around.I travel to Gurgaon for work, 100 Kms from home in these chilly mornings. Almost jammed hands and limbs do not feel numb when touched by Icy winds. Despite the chill, somehow I feel alive and ready to face the frosty weather which makes Delhi such a pleasent place to be.

The crack of dawn happens late at 7 am. While going to work , on a fine icy morning I was greeted by the most amazing patterns of Fog & Mist. The beauty with which clouds of smog-mist-fog swam on the roads and moved as co passengers in the autos, taxis, rickshaws, cars & pedestrians made us all EQUALS. I was swimming in clouds of mist without any practice. I was enthralled, it was heavenly to be surrounded by nature in a modern world. The visibility had dropped to less than a meter. It was an awesome morning and besides the inconvinience of invisible non functional traffic lights ,it was indeed a delight to travel that 100 kms.

The winter Hooligans would disguise themselves sometimes as a peacock or a doll or a bear or a cart and die on the windscreens of cars,buses and tiny eyelashes of an innocent beggar as DEW DROPS. I saw on that morning how Nature pleases us evryday we begin and brings a smile to our face. A Day in Delhi Winters prepared me to face all hardships with a smile and strengthened my belief that:

"Every cloud has a silver lining"

Even though the game of Hide and Seek will go on, with Hazy sunrays in cloudy days, in the night we will still witness a bright star shining at us in a misty chilly sleepy Delhi.
Lets enjoy Seeking the Hidden moments of joy and greet these frosty times with a warm cup of coffee.

Cheers.

What's So Happy about a New Year??

2009-01-02T03:39:00.000-08:00

The journey of Transition of calender year from 2008-2009. The transition is always good coz of celebrations & festivities.

What remains is a habit of still writing 06-01-08 instead of 2009 which is very irritating.

Memories of 2008 from happiness in personal & professional sphere to times of discord & sorrow.

From wants to broken dreams, from elusive love to moments of joy apparently by far the most enriching experiences have happened in year 2008. From cherished friendships to times of utter dissappointment. My clothes almost doubled in number and my diet shrunk in amount in the year gone by. The changes are indeed Visible ;) . The transition surely for good.

Alot of Trials and Tribulations Version 2008, I see myslf as a better person. Am all set to face the system threats of Version 2009. We are like computers, from Abacus to Pentium 4, from bulky desktops to sleek laptops, We become better. Sadly our lives are an epitome of Convinience. In terms of friendships, love, religion, morals, work and lifestyle we are all about convinience. We are becoming weak and vulnerable prone to all virus (Mental & physical). We are falling prey to instability, bad lifestyle habits and resorting to wrong ways to achieve goals.

Competition worsens and so does the need to win & succeed at any cost.

In 2008, I learnt many lessons & the struggle to survive-flourish has been fruitful. Though I saw no success, my take home did not increase as expected..I still feel I deserve more in life (like all mortals hahah) but am thankful that my Will to be better than my yester self, is intact. The imprtance of accomodating others & keeping life balanced is a very dear lesson which 2008 taught me .

An urge to be the best of myself with all the people good or bad. The year is happy coz I will make a fresh balance sheet minimizing liabilities of last year and doubling the assets of love-happiness and success. The resolutions I made were very simple: To be punctual & hardworking & to give each day my best.

There is a reason to be happy each day of each year because:

"You need to learn to be happy by nature,

because you'll seldom have the chance to be happy by circumstance."

Have a rocking 2009.

At A Loss of Words?? : A Social Perspective

2008-12-21T21:45:00.000-08:00

I'll Be your Dream

I'll Be your Wish

I'll Be your Fantasy

I'll Be your Hope

I'll Be your Love

Be everything that you need...

Well its just words which bring hope and bring disgust too. Just words..

We dream , we live, we love....Frankly sometimes nothing IS as it actually appeared. Words which are said, words which remain unsaid.

Maybe we all need permanent script writers, coz its only in movies that Hero says the right words to express himself and gets the Lady Love.No matter how hard we try, sometimes the reason for losing is never clear.

And no matter how much one tries, the losing does not cease. The pain remains , it twitches and pinches every moment.Well.. Lets look at the situation closely..

In such a scenario, One gives Pain and other Takes Pain. There is a cause and an effect. For all those intelligent Humans who feel that they did nothing to cause Pain..well I hope they soon understand that Its all a Game of EXPECTATIONS.

In a situation where one feels stifled and restless, what is the way out?

a) Stop Expecting b) Just Say it out

The possibility of Not expecting makes us indifferent and weak..and the pain will die as well as the association.After endless efforts why things between some people do not seem to sort?We all go through a time where speaking up sometimes is worse than death.We have to choose either to lose someone dear or to clear the air.And the only yardstick to make the right choice is WILL WE REGRET LATER??

But beware that both the Parties do the talking. In a normal social setup, usually it is one person always talking - sorting and another one always silent and offending.

In a loved association, one becomes the problem child and another Healer.The ultimate excuse that the problem child gives is..Disposition, Circumstances etc etc...We all know the reality.. Some people can live being Hurt and others can Live to Hurt.

But Alas!! If no one ever remains At a loss of words..the end of every association will not be so full of PAIN. We discount the people we love for exchange of some smiles and forgive them.

The end looks so near when we get to know that It was never being at a Loss of words..it was just Loss of Will to utter words that could comfort the one we Love...

But socially we refer to such situations as "AT A LOSS OF WORDS" ..

And very rightly, that it is...

MUMBAI MANIA

2008-11-27T03:05:00.000-08:00

Terror strikes again. Innocents dying for an unknown and alien cause.

How do we understand the extent of madness present in these maniacs. Well i will not shy away from commenting and going ahead to curse terrorists who to me are the biggest cowards. People who do not want to discuss their issues in a civilized manner. Poeple who do not want to be undrstood and only create fear & disgust in fellow humans.

It is very horrifying that Safety and Life which are dearest to us, are in danger perpetually at every moment. India & the major cities are becoming more of a HUB of ATTACKS rather than being Land of Opportunities. First Delhi, North Eastern Blasts and now MUMBAI...the list seems unending and the situation going out of control.

Safety anywhere is becoming a threat. Loss of property in India is very common, now thanks to THE DIVINE TERRORISTS shootouts and deaths will become common as well. I think Terrorists are the modern Demi Gods (Literally). They have all the wrath and have the power to decide who lives and who dies. Wow...seems like a Fun life.

It reminds me of games i used to play as a Kid. Chor Police and Mafia Don where it was so easy to kill the enemy..but it was all so much fun..today its a torcher. Shrieks and cries and eyes full of fear on literally every news channel on the TV, radio or internet. Yes we are at the verge of a new EPIDEMIC which is contagious and deadly its called Terrorism.

Places like The TAJ, Trident...were these not safe per say. The most coveted places to stay in Mumbai seem to be so lax in terms of security. India is like a Lazy Boxer. We have the strength and might to deal with such creepy sick human beings but we do not want to make the efforts and are on the go to please the Lobby of developed countries.

When the maniacs are let free and ruin the public peace, why not like America goto their HUB and punish them & disgrace them. When it comes to Terrorism there is NO right way of dealing with them. Its a DO or DIE. Either we kill them or be killed ourselves. We are a peace loving Nation, We do not like violence...but when it comes to the safety of the citizens the government should step in and take stern action.

Otherwise the Tolearance wil reach a point where each of us will carry a weapon and would not hesitate to set a maniac right. If all terrorists want to die for the cause of Jehad, lets give them the 2nd best option, DEATH. After all who got what they wanted the most. Hahaha....

*Sorry for hurting the feelings of anyone who are touchy about the issue. We have the Right to Speech and Expression. Post your comments. :)

A DEATH EVERYDAY

2008-11-16T10:01:00.000-08:00

As I live , as I breathe, I am aware death embraces many. Not until recently I realized the bitterness and the horrendous truth. That Nobody cares about ‘A Death’. Life moves on.

Amidst morning breakfasts, Lunch and Dinners many people die on the roads in the capital of the country. All we can do is just spoil our mood and say , “ We should be very careful nowadays” or abuse the rash driver and sympathize with the victim & say, “ I hope he is alive.”

In our busy lives, how willing is a rational MAN, to help someone in a tragedy. A tragedy like a Road Accident. On a Tuesday morning, listening to radio and singing loudly on a popular Bollywood song, my morning seemed perfect. I had a sumptuous breakfast, had a packed lunch and less of workload and boss on leave. Certainly it was one of those golden days of the week. I had plans to read a book on Kishore Biyani. I had my day all figured out.

When suddenly I saw a guy on a bike taking some unplanned Somersaults but this time I was not laughing as I usually did in a circus. Was’nt all this supposed to be funny? The screeching Brakes, the blood splashed on the clean road creating a TRAFFIC JAM, the missing Culprit.There was all that they show in movies but one thing unimagined, NO HERO. Nodody to save the victim?
No rich guy in BMW/Mercedes stopping to help the injured and then no falling in love with the sister of the victim, no songs…NOTHING. My movie ends with the hope that someone will come and save Mr Victimized.

There were a lot of cars which stopped, but only to make sure that Mr Victimized does not come under their cars as he lies on the ROAD. Yes ladies and Gentlemen, as much as we hate, in times of tragedy (especially not related to us) we act as EXTRAS. We really don’t care.

I would like to add, that I tried to stop, I wanted to help, I was baffled and not indifferent, BUT I COULD NOT HELP!! In the rush hour, morning traffic and insensitive hearts who are out to do BUSINESS..I could not reach out to help a dying 25 something guy.
Anything which disturbs the status quo is not welcome.

We tried to break out of our lane?? Instead of speeding ahead we broke out of the Lane to help Mr Victimized. It was one of the most abusive mornings I ever saw. People were shouting at us and behind the Armani Glares, furious eyes were unmoved that there is help needed at the corner of the road. The only heroes who stopped by were pedestrians and Cycle walas and beggars. I called for an ambulance from my moving car which was forced to speed into the traffic owing to the glaring eyes and left behind the dying eyes.

The pain remains till date. I might never know what had happened, maybe they were just minor injuries and Mr Victimized might be on the same roads again. I hope so.

We take risks in life but on a Road to Office/home/to your own wedding NO RISKS are permitted. Lets drive safely and maintain a low speed so that we don’t meet an unwanted death staring at us. And not invite any trouble by drinking and driving risking our lives and victimizing others.

On Second thoughts, why people become so indifferent ? I got my answer after contemplation. For those who have seen numerous deaths on the road it was just another one. They are immune to deaths until it happens with a near & dear one. Our Principles and convictions are convenient and we can willingly compromise on them. Amidst busy schedules, work pressures, interviews, making money, shopping, smiles & giggles we can’t accommodate cessation of LIFE.

I am lucky to have come back home smiling despite the mess I assume that my life is. I thank that spirit people call GOD that I have never been pushed aside on the road bleeding and unconscious unaware if I will live or not. I might crib I do not have a plush wardrobe with designer labels, no expensive bags, none of the 10 most wanted fragrances, no hefty bank-balance, I still feel lucky to be alive.

For people who see death and are immune to it, it still pains me & I feel guilty for not stopping and running on that busy road to save Mr Victimized. In a city where an unlucky person meets death everyday for breakfast/lunch/dinner/drinks, I will have a high probability to help in future.

I still believe in Fairies , Miracles and My Prince Charming , I will now believe in Heroes as well. No matter how fictitious they might seem but as Santa Claus during Christmas I might see many HEROES preventing tragedies. A HERO negotiating a deal of LIFE with DEATH for another fellow human being.

Its indeed a circus (it’s not funny still), we laugh we cry, we get new people on board on the roads, some retire & others die. Nevertheless, the show must go on. Only through mutual goodwill and concern can we dream of another chance after the unplanned somersaults injure and cripple us anywhere in the world or in the capital of the country.

We can falter on a math problem and mess up adding an extra zero in our office documents but in testing times when someone’s Life is at stake, let’s assume that WE CANNOT AFFORD TO FALTER.( It ain’t funny still but Lets smile and Live) ….

Divine Love....

2008-03-29T10:32:00.000-07:00

You and I locked in a gaze
Melting hearts and senses numb
It is a subliminal union
Magical spell unfurls.

Here in your arms I surrender
Caressed by your tender voice
Our tinkering sighs create
Profound music of love.

In the starry night, I lie awake
A sheer bliss until the daybreak
No lullabies can seduce me to sleep
I am now living My Eternal Dream.

The breeze prattles with ease
I cherish the golden peace
The souvenir of innocent love
Your pristine unsaid words.

Let there be an undying affection
Adoration will pave the desired direction
In the numerous gloomy cloudy days
Our love will spread light, I have faith.

I will breathe in the moment
This is Our chronicle of fondness.
To none will these memoirs I lend
Divine is our incessant envied happiness.
In this instant, I yearn to revivify & end.
My love, you are my strength.

TAARE ZAMEEN PAR-IT'S SPECIAL

2008-01-20T10:57:00.000-08:00

Finally a movie that is not be tagged as a One-time watch.
TZP in short is a story encapsulating LIFE.
The Survival of the Fittest is the rule of the jungle.

Ishaan, a dyslexic child is unable to cope with the fast moving world. Living in his own world, his parents refuse to accept this mental deformity of their son. TZP is not a story of Ishaan but a depiction of state of mind of inhabitants of a society. We shy away from taking responsibility of failures.

Ishaan was a victim of the repressive education system that aims at killing all creativity.
The fittest who learn and cram are the only survivors. The movie makes us aware that there exists a world of lesser privileged. THOSE unlike us, who can never think of success, fame, money but their only worry is continued existence. Children who can never be support of their aged parents but would always remain a liability.

Ohh!!! We are all sympathies!!!
But how much do we care for them??
How is the society going to contribute to make their lives better??
As a society, how willing are we to nurture a plant which is already plagued??
We decide fates and tag others as failures even without knowing the cause of failure??

Far from wanting to identify the symptoms to reach a solution, we are weighed down by the Issue. We compare and distinguish tiny tots without the slight knowledge of their capabilities. Nature has gifted a peacock with colorful feathers and a nightingale with a sweet voice. Every child is exceptional. We do the mistake of measuring the intellect and capability of a blind with a wiz kid. The need of the hour is to spot the talent and not to harp upon the weak area. The system will cripple the spirit of childhood.

Taare Zameen Par talks about collective responsibility. Instead of our sympathies, let us be kind enough to lend a helping hand. A hand stretched not out of compulsion but out of choice. Let us respect nature’s decision of bestowing distinct abilities upon these little angels and facilitate in enhancing their future.

Subjecting these tiny tots with the burden of our expectations is worse than child labor.
Forte for each is different, let’s be human enough not to subject them to the tyranny of a cruel system. Taare Zameen Par puts forth the joy of childhood and the sheer spirit each child has that makes it special and so loved. Its beyond our right to put a price tag to each spirited angel.

LETS BE THE REASONS OF A CHILD’S SMILES NOT TEARS.

My views on SPIRITUALITY

2007-12-25T10:11:00.000-08:00

WINNING OVER TEMPTATIONS

2007-12-16T10:42:00.000-08:00

Temptations are magnetic
Mortals enticed by design
Too vulnerable, too feeble
Adams and Eves still alive.

I was the devil’s advocate
I fancied straying,
Eagerly waiting to fall
I still smirk when I recall.

A wanton want crippled me
Into a futile sham it turned
My modest ego recklessly stifled
But saved from eternal damnation.

The deafening shrieks and shouts
Tears and blood in bouts,
I witnessed the pain
I was the slayer and the slain.

I was the undisputed winner
Undoubtedly the loser too.
As I won, I lost what I desired
Alas! The desirable was worth losing to.

The irony, desire never died
The will to possess still alive
Chaos and utter mayhem
A battle for good that was won.

I tremble, fetch and mourn
My last wish-you to own
I fret, the loss was too dear
I wish myself to be seared.

For my soul to survive
My mortal desires ought to die
I will burn and dissolve
Waiting for devil’s call.

I am dead, I am alive
With tears and with smiles.
It is difficult to rejoice
When a part of you dies.

But stay and listen
The bellowing dead souls
The shrieks get louder
As dead desires, I invoke.

The congregation of dead soul tells
“Desires on you would eternally dwell
Win, tame and possess them: if you can
But never be the lost enticed soul in their clan.”

Temptations lure and cripple us
They chain their masters to slaves,
Masters traded to stimulate dead desires
Struggling to be unchained but in vain.

My fall was but to rise.
I will be free, I will see the open sky,
My dreams, aspirations and ambitions
Will paint and fill the sky.

I am unchained,I have tamed thee.

AN ELEGY

2007-11-30T10:53:00.000-08:00

As a cherub, I saw light of the day
Tender hands & dazzling smiles
Those eyes I cannot forget
Alas! That touch I can no longer sense.

Those tapping fingers & infinite jingles
Lovable-adorable tone
To tempt me for an afternoon doze
Frantically I long for those moments.

The loss of someone so dear
Makes me one less a person
A presence that was omnipotent
Now an empty vacuum surrounds me.

Life lost in a blink
Life sealed as memory in ink
All I have is fond recollection
All smiles and tears abandon me now.

You saw me through as a toddler & a teen
All the spats & rows seem worth it now
As your jewel tinkers crimson-cherry
I miss the joy & bliss you would feel.

I pledge to value every passing second
I assure never to let my shine lessen and die
Till I cease to exist as a memory
You will live & breathe in my soul eternally.

Dadaji-May God Bless Your Soul.

FOR YOU-OUT OF LOVE

2007-10-26T13:46:00.000-07:00

Out of love
Out of breath.
Rapt in admiration
Fluttering my faction.
Away from my being
Away from you.

I am sinking
I feel weak.
Clasp the string
Touch my wings.
No Icarus I wish to be
Mere desire to fly with thee.

Moments pass by
Love struck I lie.
Hiding from Cupid
Now gripped in his fist.
Not unaware of the fatal arrow
Nevertheless, cheerful in dusty gallows.

No wound hurts
No fear lurks.
Awaiting the crash in love
I know not where to steer.
Alas, love is blind
Look, all colors are alive.

Stares and glances
Stolen moments and missed chances.
Chronicled recollections of when we met
Sometimes a sigh of regret.
Flirtations and sweet temptations
Silent and unsaid charming declarations.

At last broken expectations
Sessions of lamentations.
All dreams of castles trampled
Rosy eyes in respite when dampened.
Reminiscing turns bitter
Sweet temptation turns to jitters.

Amid the ruins I flew
Lost and abandoned by you.
Grateful for the chances we missed
Alas, liberated now to follow my bliss.
In peace you will rest in my past
As I practice the insipid sumptuous repast.

Out of love
Out of breath.
Rapt in self-admiration
Fluttering my faction.
Closed to you
Closed closer to my being.

Thoughts on Movie DOR( Gul Panag, Ayesha Takia)

2007-10-13T14:02:00.000-07:00

“Dor is a story about love, loss, friendship, hope and ultimately redemption.

Zeenat, an independent and self-assured young woman, lives in a Kashmiri village where she falls in love with Aamir, who she marries the day before he leaves to take up a job in Saudi Arabia. Far away in rural Rajasthan, Meera bids farewell to her new husband Shankar, who is also on his way to a job in the Middle East. Meera and Zeenat miss their husbands and get to talk to them occasionally on the phone.

The two sets of lives come collapsing down when a horrible piece of news reaches them. Shankar has been killed, and Aamir has been arrested on the charge of murder.

The truth comes out into the open and the two women have a confrontation. Meera feels betrayed, Zeenat helpless. How is the situation resolved? Does Zeenat succeed in her quest to save Aamir’s life? The film builds towards climax where these issues are resolved through a powerful and unexpected ending.”

This was an excerpt from a passage at the back of a DVD of Dor. Dor seems to be a flick made with a lot of soul. I feel it is a flick seen too late by me. The issues raised in Dor are neither unique nor universal. Dor exemplifies the existence of goodness and humanity in commonplace individuals. In the movie, life becomes a journey and destinations are mere milestones. There would be fellow travelers who can be angelic, devilish or indifferent in the course of our journey.

Like Zeenat and Meera, we would also face several mishaps in our journey wherein our faith and resolve would dwindle. These difficulties define our character and willpower. Meera a victim of social evils demonstrated that we have the power to make our own destinies no matter in how unjust and ill-fated circumstances we are. Her friendship with Zeenat gave her a fresh perspective into life and its importance. Dor literally means a long thread signifying an unobserved bond between every individual we stumble upon in our journey. Consciously or unconsciously, we do transform with every encounter we have with anyone during our existence. Meera and Zeenat could have very well made peace with the situation and felt helpless throughout their life. Nevertheless, they set out onto their journeys.

Zeenat’s sole aim was to get the forgiveness letter signed by Meera-Shankar’s widow. Zeenat was determined to find Meera somehow. Meera was literally untraceable except for by a photograph. Zeenat had set forth on a journey to save her husband and therefore finding Meera. The two women finally met after many efforts. Meera-a widow was living a miserable life of slaves. Her in-laws wanted to sell her off for petty monetary gains. Zeenat took Meera out of her exile and gave her a new perspective of life. In the course of their expedition, a lot of self-discovery takes place.

In each of us lies the strength and mettle to change the course of our lives. With all difficulties, we have a set of choices. It is our discretion whether we wish to be mere slaves of fate or desire to paint our lives taking full responsibility of our actions. Dor is a tale of self-discovery wherein every encounter becomes a learning experience for Zeenat and Meera. The movie exemplifies power of fortitude and wisdom. The essence being that our decisions and choices also give us the power to define the course of lives of people connected to us by birth, choice or fate.

Thoughts of free-will & freedom makes us selfish. We become ruthless and indifferent to our opposition. Meera and Zeenat were characters with strong orientation towards being self-reliant and self-directed. Meera became an angel when she decided to forgive Aamir who was partly responsible for her husband’s death. Meera’s response to this situation held the key for Zeenat’s happiness. Zeenat in turn made a resolve to save Meera from social evils. Our determination makes us the person we want to be. We can be as we wish to be. That divine strand-Dor is unseen and spins itself giving an opportunity to every mortal. That Dor was alternatively with Meera as well as Zeenat. We should have the might to listen to the Inner-voice and act on it without being selfish-blinded by our interests.

Each one has to manage several such Strands that silently affect many lives. Great visionaries manage to cope with the realization of such opportunities. In every stroke of luck, life and happiness, there is a Divine Intervention. DOR exhibits only one such situation which gives mere humans the power to pass divine judgments. An individual’s resolution can be a blessing and at times a curse. Let us start counting our blessings with humility and goodness.
DOR can be a story of any of us.
Lets pledge to give such stories a chance by being a good co-passenger in our journey.
We might have to be anyone from the Victim to The Benefiaciary to The Divine Intervener.
World is but a Stage...Keep Acting...........

How to become a CYNICALLY REAL PRAGMATIST

2007-10-06T14:56:00.000-07:00

Rightly said nothing lasts forever- Love, hate, peace, terror, friendship and enmity all are situational catalysts. The only common string that joins them is memory. We reminisce. Our past is full of mixed emotions. No happiness lasts forever and no sadness ever seems bearable. Tears flow and are wasted. The realization dawns later that no tear can ever explicate the grief that tears the heart into pieces. A recall some months down the line elucidates the fact that nothing is worth the Trauma. We move on, we progress and leave the people in the wake of Happiness. Sometimes we let others move on without being selfish for their good and many a times we disappear because we are selfish and want to search for our own hinterland.

The case remains why it pains when a bad memory confronts us. In the wake of becoming stronger, we escape and live vicariously. All of us are scared of the reality. Reality is the truth that is bitter and far from idealistic state of affairs. Accepting the truth and honestly taking the blame for our misdemeanors is a tough ask. Acceptance becomes tough because we lack the conviction and doubt our ability to withstand the sight of the ruins. The real cause of the agony always remains a mystery. The factors causing the worry can be internal or external but results in either self-pity or a make-belief superiority complex. The “wise” individuals go through a tedious process, moments in deep reverie, dissonance, finally attain Unison.

Ironically, very few Homo sapiens ever learn from these thoughtful sessions. We commit the same mistakes still living in the illusion that “then was a bad time and bad luck”. Only thing we forget that luck only favors the prepared mind. We have to learn and believe in ourselves. We should have a firm faith that we will be penalized if we are irrational. Alas, we live on the belief that good will happen if we remain good.

The crux of our existence is hope and faith. These are the two pillars of our survival. Ironically, we cling to these in the times of trouble thinking of them as life-supports but in reality, they are the toxic gases. Faith and hope make a perfect human romantic and impractical. We expect miracles to happen, become starry-eyed. Countless times life brings us to our feet, we plead, in dissonance, in deep reverie losing unity with self. We aimed at being a realist and on the contrary, we become Cynics. When we reach a certain height of cynicism, we are most vulnerable and gullible. Closed to all who are aliens we are happy in our own shells. Happy… but in weak moments, we let someone pierce the shell. We cling on to the fatal pillars that made us weak and cold.

We can never become cynics in the true sense of the word. We all crave for love, companionship and happiness. Memories, faith and hope make us frail only when we wish to become so. These human emotions should give us a sense of security and strength to withstand hardships of life. This is how we learn to take things in our stride. We need to define the purpose of our existence and take up our calling in life. All our memories have a meaning, all hopes have strength to turn into reality and there is faith that reality is what we deserve at that moment of time.

We question and speculate the validity of outcomes to realize much later all does happen for the best. We hope for better than the best to occur to us. We become impulsive and unreasonable, demanding momentary joys that never traverse in the pathways of our memory. Instantaneous joys often are better than reality; something that we say is too good to be true. Hence its not meant to be…its not reality. Such moments always make us weak, wobbly and uneasy, something we would not cherish. In short, a negation of memory. Impulsive and short-lived emotions neither give us hope nor re-instill our faith. When such emotions commute the lanes of our Tinsel Memory Town darkness and pollution suffocate us through many Cynical gases. We understand the crux of every emotion. This understanding comes truly with age, time and experience. We can be Cynics, Realists or just follow a religion called Pragmatism.

What we call as a generation gap is nothing but shift of perspective. My Hopes, My memories and My faith make me what I choose to be. I wish to become a CYNICALLY REAL PRAGMATIST. Alas still dreaming like an IDEALIST. That is the only IRONY.

HOUSE OF COMMONS

2007-09-16T06:17:00.000-07:00

Every day seems like a vicious circle. It starts and ends at the same disappointing juncture. When the shutters of eyes close what remains is nothingness. Self-obsession is a religion. Selfishness and eccentricity is the order of the day. “I” is more important than “we” are. Pleasure and luxury weigh heavier in our electronic balance. Fast money, fast relationships rule the planet. The dwellers of this House find it sinful to think. Rationality misunderstood as pragmatism. Sentiments and emotions are a passé. A warm welcome into the House of Commons.

The House of Commons unlike its real counterpart totally denies the existence of politics and hazardous intentions. The practice here is different from its preaching. The doors are open to all and no trespasser is prosecuted. Strangers pose no danger, as fellow dwellers are fatal enough. We fall prey to sweet-talks, injured, we change, we recoup. Everyday starts with an illusion that I am better than the yester self but alas it does not take long to come out of the world of rose-tinted glasses. All twinkling and starry eyes get cold dull with time. In the House of Commons, there are only two sects of dwellers superior and inferior. The yardstick is their yester self. The truth is every Commoner is conscious of the trajectory of their life. The rise-fall-balance all accounted for in the contemplative moments before the verdict.

For every action, there are equal and opposite verdicts. There are two rulers- Democracy and Autocracy. For House of Common collective conscience is named democracy while individually the commoners’ conscience is Autocrat. For societal rulings, Democrats win but Autocrat overrules all personal verdicts. These are mere slaves of our convenient-selfish conscience. Yes, they are hypocrites whose definition of ethics, morals and verdicts differs for self and society.

These commoners are distinct still so similar collectively. It is indeed Unity in Diversity. Individually we bend all rules and conveniently shove off issues of humanity, trust, peace and goodwill. “We” is not a unity of millions of “I” but a mere assortment of “They”. The truth is we cannot stand-alone, cannot stand for our beliefs. There is an inability to comprehend the true meaning of diversity. The commoners do not unite by choice but out of helplessness. Alienation from “we” and stress on “they” is the real eccentricity. “I” alone is nothing and hence Commoners become fatal for each other. “They” are guarding themselves from “We”. All the efforts are a defense. They and I are not able to fuse into We.

To preserve oneself from the society these common men/women become the predator as well as the prey. These social animals trapped in the vicious circle of social evils die into a deep slumber of disappointment in dark nights. The House of Commons can be free from discord if left unattended and unguarded from the strangers. To set forth equilibrium the state of anarchy be preserved. We can survive and unite in a democracy that is a façade continuing to be con artists. The House of Commons will crack with jitters of communalism, poverty, illiteracy, corruption and politics but we will do just fine with make-belief repairs. Until the realization of a looming quake, we will be a sovereign, secular democracy. Amen.

When you r gone- Avril lavigne

2007-09-13T09:00:00.000-07:00

I always needed time on my own
I never thought I'd need you there when I cry
And the days feel like years when I'm alone
And the bed where you lie is made up on your side

When you walk away I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now

When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day and make it ok
I miss you

I've never felt this way before
Everything that I do reminds me of you
And the clothes you left, they lie on the floor
And they smell just like you, I love the things that you do

When you walk away I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now

We were made for each other
Out here forever
I know we were, yeah
All I ever wanted was for you to know
Everything I'd do, I'd give my heart and soul
I can hardly breathe I need to feel you here with me, yeah

SELF- APART

2007-08-09T05:15:00.000-07:00

I saw you rise, shine and set
With each day I still fret
Born like a phoenix
I am willing to be dead

With every death
I learn to live
At every end
I learn to begin

The start is hard
End a scar
All along bruised
Injuries accrued

A prey, I bleed
Start a screech
Deafening crippling
But still finding me

Miles apart
Distant sighs
Deceased sensation
Sweet sedation

I live the death
No wish to resurrect
Numbness is bliss
An icy heart I wish

Seclusion from civility
In delusion is divinity
Torn, I heal my wound
Unseen in the wrecked dome

At once in the crowd
I see, I still pretend
Forsaken in the mob
I can not spot myself

I exist in two lives
Namely death and strife
Strife dreaded, Death beloved
With their twin sty
I abandon my twin souls to strive
I quit now, self –Apart I lie
Self-Apart, I Depart……………………

A RENDEZVOUS WITH NATURE

2007-08-06T00:57:00.001-07:00

On Friday, the 15th of June 2007 I along with a couple of friends had started off for Rishikesh-the land of gods and heavenly beauty. We had hired a taxi (AC) because the plains had become rather hot.

The journey as usual started off on a very weird note which is not uncanny (and I think dats auspicious) hehe……….a FLAT TYRE……..
Only thing I was looking forward to was the journey itself. A feast for eyes wherein even the mundane polluted abandoned deserted edifices-ruins-structures offer a novel insight.

I have an enduring belief that our eyes look at everything but see only when the psyche and body unite. When eyes search it’s a fixation and our mindful sight gets obsessed with the object. I “SAW” tons of structures of concrete throughout the pilgrimage. Yah it was a pilgrimage…to know MY GOD and follow MY RELIGION. I am the sermon, a tale to be read and understood by myself.

The philosophical diversion was very exhilarating but when dazed mind and youth blend the skirls create a trance. This trance was as pure as the ranting water of the Ganges. The journey was full of extremities from empty deserted roads to jam packed traffic jams, from maddening outpourings to the scorching sun, from a content belly to a killing void.

We were planning a halt at Cheetal Resort and were searching for it till midnight forgetting that it works on the concept of early to bed and early to rise. And the furious four were far from early risers and more of insomniacs. The expedition was educative and fascinating for my hungry mind. The darkness of the night was more enlightening, closer to life and more alive.

The minds at fire halted at Rishikesh the final destination without a reservation at 3 past midnight. The silence was refreshing and more secure unlike the silence of Delhi/ metro which is dreaded usually. The pristine environs were a delicacy for us. The Youth Hostel was the best possible temple for special creed of pilgrims. After feeding ourselves with a seemingly sumptuous feast we nourished our spirits.

Me and Smita (a fellow pilgrim & very dear friend) saw Rishikesh rise from the comforting darkness to a bright vivacious dawn. The process of sunrise and an advent of 16th June 07 was a laboratory experiment. I felt powerful not because I could control the experiment but because I felt one with nature…a part of the day. I was included with the clouds and birds in the celebration of a new dawn. I and Smita, two mortals mesmerized,
were the priests following the usual morning festivities. We greeted daylight with an intoxicating garland of sleep.

RIVER RAFTING is a practice with young pilgrims who visit the city. A water sport for which we shelled out Rs 400 per person (seemed a hype then) was worth every penny.
The thrill and adventure was unparalleled. The 90 minutes water stint was a victory for most of the fellow rafters. It was a triumph over apprehensions and restoration of faith in oneself. Belief in survival of the fittest (Darwin was not wrong indeed). The splash of cold Ganges acted as a coolant for the soul and cleansed the mind simultaneously. The experience was very subtle and incredible. Smita was a little afraid in the initial stages but she gracefully managed to survive. The gang members (Neha and Ri) also proved to be fit for survival in the extreme flow of the holy water.

It was hard to find civilized food as the place seemed to be more of desi ghee and masala cooking than anything that would help us to survive for 3 days. So we preferred to eat at the hotel itself and the meals were very sumptuous but sometimes bland.

For three days we knew only one part of Rishikesh- one opposite our room. The bond between the mountain range was inspiring. Each crevasse, each boulevard uphill (badrinath) was telling a story a journey through time. The witnesses were the clouds, birds, the Laxman Jhula as all lived like a community. From the windows, the doors and the spaces in the garden our eyes saw nothing but the expanse of two vast masses rising from the land. Theses were stirring the army of clouds ordering them to control activities of the sun with birds aiding to send messages across various sects of haze, mist and clouds.

A mass of white sand was shining all through the night. The moonlight made sand look divine and all the viewers were captivated because the gurgling misty water added the celestial touch. Recollections of the unimaginable sight in the night were so strong that I and Smita had found out a way to get to that white peninsular. We set off at 5 pm in shorts and t-shirt. After juggling on foot, taxi and rickshaw and reached the Hinterland. I felt like a chirpy fairy….it was a delight.

The night was full of smoke and mist. Most of it was human attempt to feel unison with nature. So natural grass and hash were used as a medium and the night went by in a trance. We waited for the sunrise but deep slumber had prevailed.

The following morning, Sunday, we set off for journey back to New Delhi. The hustle of the city was a welcome change. The whistle of chimneys, deafening sounds of shrieks, perpetual hunger-greed and blurring human shadows gave a sense of security. An assurance that adapting to the evils and understanding the sins is mandatory to attain sanity. Today, a Satan can tempt no Adam-Eve, as we all are an expression of human beauty and the human beast. The choice is critical. A tryst with nature and our reality can make us blinded to participate in the immense beauty or to own the power over it. I choose to be a part of the appreciative and constructive world. Learning about the human character has been possible by a rendezvous with nature.

I still have a long way to go to comprehend our true self.

On my own...ALONE

2007-08-01T04:02:00.000-07:00

A lot of words unsaid,
Plenty of dreams dead.
Where did I falter?
I am anxious to know.

Quiet and reserved,
Heart broken and numb.
Anesthetized I lie,
Alone amidst countless silent sighs.

Alas! Never sensed the touch of hope.
The garb of pretense and love
I have to shove,
But I am forbidden to let go.

Impossible to worship you
Uneasy the existence becomes
Dissonance and conflict
Still I wish to hold on.

Faith dying lifeless,
Discord in abundance.
Erased chronicles,
Maneuvering expectations.

Crack of dawn
I plead to live on,
Like a phoenix
I rise from my dead.

Now, I disregard my past
No inscriptions last,
I breathe, I survive
Without a sigh.

The art, the life
The quick disguise
An eyewitness to all
I am the master of the Ball.

Devoid of apprehensions
In the moments alive
My moans now unvoiced
Only a prolonged smile

Losing my religion
I Confess am blinded
For good, I need you no further
I am on my own….Alone……….

Divine Beauty

2007-08-01T01:59:00.001-07:00

The photo taken - Dal lake...while seated in a shikara..
The scenic beauty is breth taking and cannot be captured..

Chilled water is unlike the warmth which resides in the hearts of Kashmiris....

Peace in progress

Heaven on Earth

2007-08-01T01:44:00.001-07:00

The obtrusive rocks bear the brunt...but manage to slow down the brutal attacks of the massive flow of water......

Silence in turbulance

2007-08-01T01:38:00.001-07:00

Picture says alot. Kashmir is similar to these turbulent waters....
A soundless picture just tells nothing about the reality.
A silence aftr the blast,a riot does not talk about the fear but peace...

We are decived tons of times....
Turbulance is bliss and silence can kill..
Speak up..reach out

POWER OF DREAMS

2007-06-14T01:23:00.000-07:00

Aristotle said "hope is a waking dream."

HOPE AND DREAM - An indelible part of our existence. Perhaps the only ingredients that keep a human life wanting to subsist and live.

A dream in reality is nothing but a wish, a ray of light any individual would look forward to. We usually do not remember the episodes of our dream. According to a recent research any recollection of a dream is nothing but a photographic memory- coming in a flash of a second. And sub-consciously every human is running after it. The great men know themselves and hence understand the importance of that flash and its imagery…Mortals like me do not.

Oprah Winfrey’s words “ I’ve come to believe that each of us has a personal calling that’s as unique as a fingerprint- and that the best way to succeed is to discover what you love and then find a way to offer it to others in the form of a service, working hard, and also allowing the energy of the universe to lead you.”

From our dream stems our aspirations, desires and objectives of life. Our dreams make us what we are HUMANS. A species of mammals which has progressed the most amongst all….

This my friend is the POWER OF DREAMS………………

So keep the battery of dreams all charged………

Desire

2007-06-12T03:58:00.000-07:00

"Those who restrain desire,
Do so
Because
Theirs is weak enough to be restrained"

William Blake

Feels like Heaven

2007-06-11T01:32:00.000-07:00

A heaven on earth on my way to Nainital(Jan 07)..

Clicked from the heights ..a lake in the heart of the mountains....................

By the way the pic was taken while i was travellin in a van..

Why am I Losing My Religion ?? I wonder why???

2007-06-08T03:33:00.000-07:00

This is a song that I love...

Oh, life is bigger
It's bigger than you
And you are not me
The lengths that I will go to
The distance in your eyes
Oh no, I've said too much
I set it up

That's me in the corner
That's me in the spotlight,
I'mLosing my religion
Trying to keep up with you
And I don't know if I can do it
Oh no, I've said too much
I haven't said enough
I thought that I heard you laughing
I thought that I heard you singI think
I thought I saw you try

Every whisper Of every waking hour
I'mChoosing my confessions
Trying to keep an eye on you
Like a hurt lost and blinded fool, fool
Oh no, I've said too muchI set it up
Consider thisConsider this
The hint of the centuryConsider this
The slip that brought me
To my knees failedWhat if all these fantasies
Come flailing aroundNow I've said too much
I thought that I heard you laughing
I thought that I heard you sing
I think I thought I saw you try

But that was just a dream
That was just a dream
But that was just a dream
Try, cry, why try?
That was just a dream
Just a dream, just a dream
Dream

SHUCHI

2007-06-08T02:41:00.000-07:00

My existence was bursting of ambiguity,
Vagueness shrouded my being.
Mysterious and unseen I was
Even when the sun beamed.

I desired neither deference nor disdain,
Bedazzled neither by glee nor by pain,
Yearned neither to be complex nor plain,
I aspired neither being accomplished nor maimed.

From my profound past,
Sagacity and wisdom now emanate.
Brimming with novel might,
I rove, I soar, I explore.

I know now, I was that star.
I was glimmering in the dark.
I am the gleam, I am the light.
Let my sheen shine bright.
Clasp, embrace and hold
I am the home of hope.